Everybody's going surfin... Surfin' USA...

I went surfing for the first time earlier this week. Well, more like snurfling. (Snurfling is an activity characterized by spending more time face down in the water than actually standing on the board.) People think that all you have to do is stand up on the board and let the wave do the rest of the work. I am here to tell you that that is totally, one hundred percent... WRONG! Surfing is about 95% paddling with your hands and only 5% surfing. This means that first you must lay yourself tummy-down on the board. Then you paddle with your hands, out towards those tumultuous waves. Once there, you wait until a choice looking wave starts to roll your way. When you decide that the oncoming swell is “the one”, you turn your board back towards shore and start paddling. Yes that's right, more paddling. Once you start to build up speed and can feel the wave breathing down your neck, you stand up on your board and (hopefully) ride the wave until it breaks. Here is where the problem starts for me. Most of my strength is in my legs. The majority of the athletic activities that I engage in are leg intensive sports. Even when I swim, I don't use the crawl stroke, I prefer the breast stroke. Which leaves me with very little upper body muscle and a big problem when it comes to surfing. Since most of the work has to be done using the muscles belonging to the top half of my body, I spent more time fighting the waves than I did actually trying to stand up on the board. I didn't get very far. I just barely made it to standing position a couple of times but I was not experienced enough (being that it was my first time) to actually ride the wave. To my credit, these were the biggest waves that beach had seen for at least two months. My friend said it was not a good day for a beginner. So, it took me ten times longer than the average surfer duuuuuuude to get anywhere. And I never really managed to do anything that would even remotely qualify as surfing. But you know what? I stayed out there for the whole two hours and kept on trying. And I enjoyed it too. Now I know what it takes to succeed at surfing. I think I am going to start working out my upper torso and maybe give it another try next summer. It's good exercise, it's enjoyable and since the best waves are at six in the morning, the beach is empty. Sounds like a win-win all around. One thing's for certain, though... boy am I sore!

Tick Tock. Tick Tock.

A couple years back, I met a girl who claimed she had a biological time clock. It seems that her internal body clock was somehow synchronized with the time flow around her. I was fascinated by this. I couldn't understand how someone was able to wake up without an alarm clock or plan to leave the house at 4:45 and then happen to look up at the time just as the clock reached a quarter to five. It just didn't make sense to me. I thought maybe this was a talent that one is born with, one which I would be unable to learn. Since then I have learned that there are ways to develop this ability. There are books that allegedly teach one how to synchronize his/her internal body clock. And I am sure there are gurus somewhere on earth who espouse the benefits of becoming synchronized, how one can become enlightened through it. But that is not how it reentered my life. Instead, it appears that it surreptitiously infiltrated my sleep cycle. Somehow I have developed a knack for an internal alarm clock. No, it is not perfect. It can be off by plus or minus ten minutes. And if I am really exhausted it may fail to wake me at all. But it is there. A number of times I forgot to set my alarm clock or set it wrong and woke up anyway. The weird thing is, it isn't like I worked on it at all or decided, “Gee, this is something that I really need.” In fact I had totally forgotten that it existed. And still it decided to waltz its way into my life. I'm not complaining. I actually think it is kinda cool. I can't wait to hone it more. The only problem is, since I never actively developed it, I don't know how to sharpen it. But I'm sure something will come to me...Speaking of the cycles of sleep and waking, another weird thing has happened to me. For some reason, every day at about 6 AM, I wake up. I can't think of a reason why, it just happens. I usually just roll over and go back to sleep since I am pretty sure that G-d never intended for anyone to be up that early in the morning. If you have to, you wake up. But never by choice. At the beginning I thought that maybe I was being roused at that early hour because I had had enough sleep already. However, that is not the case. I don't go to sleep at the same time every night. Some nights I turn in when it is distinctly morning already. So it doesn't make sense that I am waking up then because I am fully refreshed. There has to be some other reason, some other purpose. Every day I awake at that time, every day at six six six. Maybe I am being sent a message... Maybe I am the antichrist...

Acquire for yourself a friend and make for yourself a Webbi...

Overheard while passing through a local BT yeshiva:

Guy #1: You know there is a lot of depth to Judaism.
Guy #2: I have not yet had a chance to fully explore it.
Guy #1: You should check out Derek Hashem.
Guy #2: Dot com?

An entry about proofreading... which wasn't proofread...

Recently, I was berated by a reader about it taking me too long to proofread and edit my 'blog entries. I responded at that point but I have a little to add. And just for kicks, I decided not to proofread this entry. ;-) I think it is very important to make sure your communication is understandable and clear. Not just on a 'blog but in every interaction, whether it be e-mail, phone or in person. Many arguments begin because of misunderstandings. But even if it never goes as far as a feud or fight, there are still ramifications. Sometimes you just don't get your point across. Many times you might not even know it. But it is true. Other people just don't “get” what you are saying because you weren't clear enough. Take for example the sign I saw today, posted on a shul bulletin board. It said: Want a used laptop computer Please call Chaim Goldberg (718) 555-1212 . Now what did the guy mean? Did he mean, “Do you want a used laptop computer? (QUESTION MARK) If so I am selling one so please call me." OR did he mean, “I am looking to purchase a used laptop computer. If anyone knows of someone who has one to sell, please call me.” Since there was no punctuation at the end and he said “want a laptop”, rather than “I want a laptop”, it is unclear what he meant. Now I suspect that he is selling one, not looking for one. But someone else who looked at the sign seemed to be under the impression that he is in the market for used laptops. Maybe he wants to sell his AND is looking to buy a newer model so he meant both meanings. Somehow I doubt that though. I wish more people would proofread. It would make everything a lot easier. Or at the very least clearer. And I wouldn't walk around all day long wondering whether he is looking for a computer or just trying to get rid of his.